Money is often cited as a leading source of stress in relationships — and for many men, it’s also a source of secrecy.

A new survey finds that nearly half of men in committed relationships have kept financial secrets from their partner, underscoring the emotional and societal pressures men face when it comes to money.

The survey, conducted by Talker Research and commissioned by Beyond Finance for Mens Mental Health Month, polled 2,000 American men. Among those who were married or in long-term relationships, 49% admitted to hiding something money-related from their significant other. The most common secrets? A hidden savings account (14%), followed by undisclosed spending habits (13%) and a secret credit card or line of credit (12%).

“Shame, secrecy and silence are driving real harm, not only to personal finances, but to relationships, careers and mental health.”

Why the secrecy? Many respondents cited embarrassment (27%) or shame (26%), while nearly one in five simply “didnt know how to bring it up.” The findings suggest that financial silence is often less about deceit and more about fear and vulnerability — emotions that men are culturally conditioned to suppress.

Nearly half of the men surveyed said they feel pressure to be financially successful, a stressor most often internalized but also fueled by societal expectations. This pressure appears to take a toll. The study found a clear connection between financial and mental health: men who rated their financial health as “poor” also reported the lowest levels of mental wellbeing.

Despite this, many men remain reluctant to seek support. Only 41% said they would talk to their partner about financial stress, and even fewer said they would confide in a financial professional (23%), friends (19%), or parents (12% for mothers and 11% for fathers).

“This survey confirms what weve long suspected — men are suffering in silence when it comes to money,” said Lou Antonelli, chief operating officer at Beyond Finance. “Financial anxiety is isolating, and many men dont feel safe opening up. This is why were encouraging men to stop gambling with their wellbeing and start building both financial and emotional resilience.”

The emotional cost is high. Two out of five men said their financial situation has made them feel disconnected from their social circles, with those struggling the most financially feeling the most isolated.

“This research points to a broader cultural issue: Men are emotionally overwhelmed by money, yet afraid to seek help. Shame, secrecy and silence are driving real harm, not only to personal finances, but to relationships, careers and mental health,” said Nathan Astle, a certified financial therapist at Beyond Finance.  

“This isnt about being perfect,” Astle said. “Its about giving men permission to be honest about where theyre at — and then helping them build a healthier, more hopeful path forward.”

As conversations about mens mental health gain momentum, the role of financial stress — and the silence surrounding it — is beginning to take center stage.