This story is true. The names have been changed to protect the innocent. This adventure started out as a whim, and grew into a great deal more. I cannot and do not claim exclusive authorship of this story, because I have some ghost co-authors. This is not the typical wham-bam story that is common out there. As I have mentioned before, I like a plot … and this story has several. It is almost voyeuristic, in that you are reading someone else’s private e-mail.

It all began with the placement of a personal ad on Yahoo! Personals. The story that follows is based on the results of that ad, and includes the actual responses received, my responses to them, and the results and happenings at the various meetings and phone calls that took place. Note that the e-mails are all actual, word-for-word as received and / or sent. The phone calls and meetings are paraphrased to some extent. This story covers only two of the many responses received. Some of the respondents have been dropped, and others are still on-going … if I get positive comments on this format and theme, I will no doubt post more as they reach fruition.

About the pictures mentioned in the e-mails … yes, I do have pictures of every respondent … and I actually have multiple pictures of these two … but in keeping with general privacy considerations and with the general theme of Sir’s media outlet, I have not included them … you’ll just have to go by the descriptions they provided and use your imagination. E-mail addresses have been changed, as have identities (except for mine, of course …) and phone numbers, but pictures would have been too personal. All these events happened concurrently, but to make it less confusing, I have separated them into chapters by respondent. Enjoy …

The Original Ad placed in Yahoo Personals:

Mistress Wanted.
I am looking for a woman to spoil by providing her with whatever it may be that she desires in exchange for her providing me with whatever it is that I desire … I can provide a North Dallas apartment and a car for the right person. What can you provide for me? I prefer petite women … possibly a Latina or Oriental...but will consider all who reply. Interested? E-mail spanglesmuldoon@hotmail.com

Chapter One: Marcia

From: Kitty
Too bad I'm a 6'0 blonde.....(with kids, sigh)

From: Spangles Muldoon
Kitty...Like I said in the ad....I will consider all...and I would certainly consider a 6' 0" blonde... after all, a preference is just a preference...

From: Kitty
Ok, I responded yesterday, and have really been thinking about this.....Are you really for real? Have you gotten any promising responses? I am just really curious.....I think a relationship like this is ideal. I'm not sure why I find this ad so compelling......Please answer, if only for the hell of it.....

From: Spangles Muldoon
Kitty....Yes...I am indeed for real. Actually, I have received many more responses than I expected.... I, too, think this kind of relationship is ideal....and that is why I wrote the ad...Interested?

From: Kitty
Sure, tell me more.....What expectations do you have of your mistress? What else would you like to know about me? I have pictures if you want to give me an e-mail address to send them to. Do you have a picture of yourself as well? I am still intrigued.....

From: Spangles Muldoon
Kitty....First, there would be the 'traditional duties' of a mistress...do I really need to go into what those are?? Because if I do, you might not be right for this anyway.... In addition, I want a companion who can attend social events and business functions with me, and who can feel equally comfortable in a formal or in blue jeans. Someone who can travel on occasion for business trips and vacations...

From: Kitty
Hmmmm, yeah, explain the "traditional duties" *smile* No, you don't have to, I think I can figure them out.....As for the rest, I do know which forks to use and can make conversation with almost anyone in any social situation.   I can also put on

a pair of jeans and hang out with the best of them, I have a knack for adjusting to whatever situation I find myself in and acting accordingly. I was in sales for many years and I think that helps.....Now, one last issue....I don't know if you remember or not, but I do have children.....We would have to work around that somehow...either when they are sleeping (for the, ah, duties, when desired) or by getting a good sitter....for the functions, travel, etc.....Needless to say they would be kept completely in the dark about all of this.....They are used to my going out, so that would be nothing unusual.....Let me know what your thoughts are......

Spangles Note to the Reader:

At this point I sent a response that apparently did not go through, and an e-mail from Kitty to me apparantly never made it either. I followed it up with another one asking what happened.....

From: Kitty
 I did reply, then didn't hear anything back from you. Where can I send a pic, since you didn't give an e-mail address......If you still haven't found your petite mistress. I'd hate to be the consolation prize....

From: Spangles Muldoon
Kitty....you can send e-mail with attachments to my yahoo address... spanglesmuldoon@yahoo.com...I am looking forward to seeing what you look like....and no, you are by no means a consolation prize...fact is, you are currently at the top of the list..."

From: Kitty
I think I may have responded to you from another e-mail account. I have a few screen names....I am going to send a pic now....I'll send two actually and you can see.....What exactly are you expecting from whoever you choose? I am home sick today so I can respond pretty quickly if you do....And maybe at some point we could talk?

From: Spangles Muldoon
Kitty...I got your pic, and I must say I am very impressed. You are really gorgeous...maybe we can arrange to meet for lunch or coffee? I have attached my pic for you....

From: Kitty
Lunch would be fine, but I really would like to talk to you on the phone and have you hear my voice and hear yours....let me also say that looks are important in the sense that there is some attraction, but I am attracted to guys more by how they act/treat me then I am by their looks.....And a picture is nice, but it is always different in person.....That is the real test....


From:Kitty
Ok, I'm gonna risk something here...I'm going to give you my #  it is 214-555-1212, I'll be home until 1:15 or so, I am meeting someone for lunch (soup, since I've been sick,hopefully I can take it!!).  So call me......

From: Kitty
Ok, E-mailed you my #, then realized that AOL is probably slow at delivery....sooooo I should be home later this afternoon and I'd like you to call. That will also give us a chance to talk(altho it might be a tad awkward to start, if we want to persue this we will have to be able to converse....). I would feel better.....It is somehow more personal then these e-mails, and I have always been somewhat of an instant gratification person....that will indulge that need for me..... :)


From: Kitty
Ok, I'm home again....And not really planning to go anywhere else...at least til it's time to pick up the kids...Call me when you get a chance....I may lie down and try to rest...It's about 3 or so now....

Spangles Note to the Reader:

Okay. I called Kitty and talked to her for about an hour. It really wasn't awkward at all, and we seemed to click pretty well. She asked some of the obvious questions, the why's and so on, and I gave her pretty much the same answers I had given her in the e-mails. I told her where I worked (generically, of course....meaning I told her I worked at the airport, but not specifically where at the airport.). I complimented her on the picutrres she sent, which were really pretty good. E-mail started again the next day.

From: Kitty
I would like to meet you and go from there. I pass by the airport everyday on my way home(I think.....LOL) and if you'd like and are planning on being there I could stop off for a few minutes after work and introduce myself. How does that sound? I would like to get the face to face meeting over asap and I think that will give me an even better sense of where this could go. Let me know.

Spangles Note to the Reader:

Okay folks...here's a test for you. Did I agree to this? Would you?

From: Kitty
What I didn't say is thank you for the complements......you are very sweet.....

From: Spangles
Kitty...this just wont be possible, at least today. I'm going flying in about an hour, and won't be back until probably dark. Besides, I would rather meet you someplace where we can find a quiet corner to sit in and talk undisturbed. That would never happen where I work.

Spangles Note to the Reader: Okay...how many of you got that one right?

From: Kitty
 No problem....It was kinda an impulse thing....I'm sorry tho, I did have about an hour free in between work and picking up the kids....I won't have that time again til Thurs or Fri of next week. I already have lunch plans for tomorrow, and tentative plans for lunches next week too....I'm sorry it isn't convenient today, I just really wanted to stop for a min and say hi, not make a big production(not that I wouldn't want you to show me around....Just didn't plan on it today, wanted to just see you.....) ANYWAY, we will see what we can come up with. I am eager to meet and go from there.....(you are absolutely sure you couldn't spare, oh say 5-10 min around 5:15 or so?)

From Spangles
Sorry. It just isn't possible. There is a flight planning meeting first, the we leave right after that....

From: Kitty
Well, you won't get this til after your meeting, so maybe you'll call me later....I guess I should fess up, I just happen to look pretty today,lol (have a nice dress on, my hair is doing alright despite the heat.....*smile*) Not that I'm not usually pretty, but I wore one of the dresses that I really like and wanted to show off a bit (ok, it's the Leo in me....*grin*) I'm glad you have a good feeling about this, I am still kinda mulling over everything in my head......As for lunch, we might be able to meet, I have to just juggle things around a bit....Ok, well, have a good afternoon and I'll talk to you soon.....

From: Kitty
G'morning,
How are you? I woke up with a bit of a headache, yuck....maybe I'm not totally recovered yet. I hope today is less hectic then yesterday. You know I was thinking....(uh oh, right,lol) I mean, all the stuff you were talking about doing for "her"(your mistress) is great, but you know what I love? I love things like getting flowers at work, or gifts(jewlery, clothes,chocolate-Godiva oysters are my fave!!), that sort of thing....that means a lot to me in a relationship..... I have always been a bit high maintenance, but I think I am worth it....I mean, I think we talked about what you were willing to help with and everything, but I think that we may, if things work out, evolve into more then just a business arrangement.....One of my biggest fears is having to defer to you, in the sense, that if you are helping me out and I am taking care of certain things for you, what if you get upset with me or something? Does that mean that you cut me off financially? I hated when my ex would do that....it was like, oh, you didn't do what I wanted, so you can't get....(fill in the blank) I mean, what if one of the things I needed was to get the kids some clothes...would you just give me money, or would you want to come with us and buy it right there....these are just practical considerations that have occured to me....altho I would love to go shopping with you.....I would even let you pick things out for me...I actually need some new things, I have lost a lot of weight since I moved here and I would say that 80-90% of my things are huge on me. Oh, just as an FYI, I LOVE Victoria's Secret, and have no problems wearing beautiful/sexy lingerie. I have some stuff now....matching bra's and panties, as well as teddys and that sort of thing....(I even have some stuff from Fredricks from when I used to live in LA) I haven't had much occasion to wear the more racy stuff, but I do wear the bra/panties combos all

the time, I feel good when I wear that stuff.....NOT to say my body is perfect, I have a bit of a tummy and my butt could use some tightening....I have some stretch marks(3 kids'll do that) but I don't think you would run in horror either.....Hey, that is something you could do, renew my gym membership, that way I could start working out again, I know once I do that I will look even better(grin) I had a membership with Bally's that my ex was supposed to renew earlier this year, but never did(surprise, surprise,LOL)....Ok, wow, this was a really long e-mail.....I hope you aren't taken aback....I was pretty blunt....Well, better you get even more of a feel for who I am and what I like, I guess I would rather we go into this eyes wide open then stumble around surprised later.....Ok, one other concern/thought (ok this is where I might scare you off*grin*) In regards to, ahhhhh, sex.......Is this going to be a one-sided thing, I mean, my "job" is to please you only? Or are we going to be partners in this? Ok, I am going to stop here and let you answer some of what I've written about.....Gosh, you can tell I have really been thinking about all of this really seriously.....Answer me soon, cause I will be anxiously awaiting your reply.....

From: Kitty
Whoops, forgot to mention the wining and dining.....but I think that would be mutually enjoyable.....Plus, I want you to know that altho you would be doing these nice things for me, I would totally be there for you too, even if it was just for companionship sometimes ( I am a great friend, and extreemly loyal once I care about someone....)....in addition to the going to business stuff and biker rallies and everything.....Just don't ask me to clean or do laundry, domestic goddessness is not my forte....(there's another thing, I would love someone to clean occasionally,lol) You may be getting yourself into more then you thought.....I am sounding more and more like either a mistress or a high maintenance girl-friend....but let me tell you I won't pout or act sullen if you ask me to go someplace/do something I don't want to do.....Oh which reminds me, one other sex thing....NO anal....I hope that isn't a big deal to you, but I won't do that, nor will I do anything with more then one person, just doesn't float my boat (no, I haven't tried it), other then that I am pretty flexable......(whoh, that may have been more info then you needed right now.....You can tell I'm in a mood today....This is the time ask those questions you may have thought were kinda awkward.....*smile*)

Spangles Note to the Reader:

At this point, it really looks like she is interested in pursuing this. Remember, she has seen my photo, and we have talked on the phone once. We still have not met at this point. The response I sent to this message was lost somehow. I mean, somehow or other I don't have it anymore, so I'll have to skip on the her next message, which follows. Most of the messages that follow the next one are ones where she quoted my e-mail to her, so putting in my mesages would be redundant. That being the case, I'll let her e-mail run along without mine for a bit. I think it will still make sense.....

From: Kitty
 Ok, I guess I'll keep going since I was reassured by your response so far.... Just as another FYI (since you sort of mentioned it) I have not been able to orgasm just from penetration, and always need some additional assistance...but I am multi-orgasmic-and not prudish at all with the right person, in fact since I left my ex and allowed myself to feel sexual feelings again(he totally turned me off and I never cheated, I just didn't let myself feel) I have realized that I am a very sensual woman with very strong needs. Admitedly we might have to take it a bit slow to begin with (since I am not very active, I get sore after too too long....) or at least rest in between.....Oh and about the gym thing...I am already pretty flexable....*grin* But I'm sure my stamina could be built up..... I am actually getting a bit turned on talking about all of this....I don't want you to think I'm a tramp, I'm not, I am very discriminating( I am not desperate by any means, and guys totally respect me, I don't give them any other choice, as an example, I often go on dates where we don't even kiss on the first or second dates....) but I am also, as I said, a very sexy woman, with normal desires.....I figured I'd answer the last e-mail while I waited for the second one...I'll see if it's here yet.....(you can't tell me that this doesn't make you want to meet even more quickly!!! I could possibly stop for 15 min or so on my way home.....One last chance before the weekend.....)


From: Kitty
     Alright, let me answer these questions while they are fresh in my mind( I haven't figured out how to do the cut and paste thing over here- your answers are so nicely laid out *smile*) Oral, yes, I love it if it is done well. Mmmmmmmm.......and as 

for me doing to you, well, shall I say that I have been told that it is incredible. Altho, I wont swallow ( I guess if I fall in love it might be a different story, but initially it just grosses me out- But I wouldn't just stop doing anything, I would use my hand or something so you would still come to completion- as I said, that could change at some point, but I would have to be really comfortable with you. I'm not even sure initially if we would do that without a condom(flavored) which means, yeah, I'll stay there the whole time....As for 69, I also like to concentrate on what I'm doing, so I would prefer we take turns. Ok, quickies and other assorted things....I am all for spontineity, but not exibitionism, so if we are turned on and want to go for it, why not? Provided there is some privacy. If there are times that it is just a quicky, fine, I'm sure I will get my satisfaction later and I would not begrudge you yours. Or, if you just want to cuddle and do the oral/manual thing, that is fine too..... As for my not being in the mood....I guess it would depend, I would probably just try to get as into it as I could. If I were really sick or something it might be hard...but if I'm just in a bad mood it might distract me.....Who knows, there might be times I am in the mood and you are not *grin*. Nope, you were not out of line at all...I opened this conversation, you just continued it, which is fine, I think it is great that we can be so open and upfront about things.....It is an auspicious beginning......Did I forget to answer any questions? Or are there any others you've thought of?

From: Kitty
I wish I didn't have lunch plans, I would have offered to come over then, but I have plans to meet someone and not way to reach them. I'm glad you are going to take some time for yourself....is there any chance that you would be in the area around 5? Not at work, but anywhere in this vicinity or the vicinity of where I live? (near the Northpark mall off of 75) I really don't want to wait until next week to meet you......

From: Kitty
My apt is in what I consider a horrible part of town and I would definately consider moving closer to work/you (which I think are in the same area) I like the idea of having you a few 

minutes away so if you decided to spend some time with me you could just hop in the car and come over. I also hate the fact that I am in DISD, my son (and daughter) have been having a rough time because they are the minority in that school. I would love to get them into Richardson or Plano, or really anywhere that they were less of a minority and the kids were from a different backround. Also, my apt is not conducive to romance since I have only one bedroom and share it with my children, we would need at least 2 maybe 3 bedrooms to be assured of privacy. (VERY IMPORTANT!!) Someone told me that the older two, because they are a boy and a girl cannot be put in the same bedroom. Texas law or something....Which means in a two bedroom Dria would be sharing my room.....Well, we can talk about it.....Whoops, never did say where I live, that would be off of Park Lane and 75- totally "colorful" neighborhood that I hate!! I am only there because my Grandmother lives across the hall from me and I wanted to be close to her. Oh, one other downside to my being in that apt is that there is very little privacy. The majority of the tenents are elderly and have nothing else to do but watch peoples comings and goings......Which is why they can live there, they don't have to interact with the neighborhood(the complex has bus trips to Walmart, and bingo every Weds, happy hr on Fri nights, ah, monthly dinners, etc> Basically self contained for an elderly person....It is perfect for my Grandmother, and lousy for me...In fact, I have been followed home a few times.....I actually had to find a police station once, and the other times found an officer. Now I carry mace. Wow, did you ever get an earful, and from a seemingly simple question, sorry!! I have mostly been waiting til I can start getting some child support to move. There is no way right now that I could come up with that kind of cash.....(but you already knew that) ANYWAY......I am glad our e-mails today had that kind of effect on you....whoo hooo, they did on me too, I had taken dessert" to go" from lunch and have been thinking of all sorts of decadent things to do with it- It is a turtle cheesecake, with whipped cream(yummy) and carmel sauce.....creamy, sticky, smooth.....I could think of a few interesting things......Some of them have to do with bringing you to completion...as for tiring someone out before that could happen, hopefully I would be able to excite you enough that 

that wouldn't be a problem......I guess we'll see....I am already starting to think of this as a fait acompli, I don't know about you.....Unless you are tremendously disappointed in me....Which I can't imagine.....Which brings me to my next question...how will we seal our agreement if it comes to that? One of my bad points, I tend not to have a lot of trust, and how do I know you won't just use me and leave me? I mean, you could be promising me the world, and when reality comes you end up with everything and I end up with nothing.....I don't mean to be cynical, and I hope I'm not ruining anything, but it is a concern. You don't seem like the type of guy who would do that, but I am just wary.....I have been burned before by guys that promised a lot, and came thru with nothing....and I'm talking about emotional here, not so much material...but promises are promises in my mind. I don't want to build up to something and be hurt. Which, in addition to the things we've mentioned, is one reason I don't become physically involved with just anyone.... And initially we are keeping this sort of business like, and that will be my way of protecting myself from pain. Ok, I went from being totally upbeat and sexy(which I am still feeling, by the way *grin*) to totally serious....I hope you don't mind....it just seems like we are talking about everything and again, I'd rather this stuff come out now, and we be as free from doubt as we possibly can. My work # is 972-555-1212 if you'd like to call.....It is up to you. Otherwise please call me sometime this weekend if you are around....if not, I understand....or if it is awkward for you because of your current situation I understand that too. You said you had some other questions for me.....go ahead and ask away......

Note to the Reader from Spangles:

Okay...this is when I arranged to meet her for lunch....

From: Kitty
That will work....call me and I'll tell you what I'm wearing....I am only going to have a little while, is that alright? (I'll give you a hint tho, heels are part of my ensemble *wink*)

Note to the Reader from Spangles:

And, of course, I asked for a hug when I met her....

From: Kitty
Sure, you can have a hug....and how much in-depth do you want me to go in terms of what I have on? *grin*

Note to the Reader from Spangles:

Lunch went well. I picked her up at work, and we went to an Italian place. It wasn't possible to get a quiet corner, but we managed to talk a lot anyway. I was impressed with her, and, by the way, got two hugs from her. I told her that I could arrange a helicopter ride for her, and that I was planning a bike trip for the following weekend....As I mentioned above, she learned how to quote from my e-mail, so I will continue with just her mail from this point. I think it will still make sense....

From: Kitty
I can't get over how beautiful you are...I defintely, definately want a better picture of you...one that does you justice...Wow...what a knockout...I am more impressed with you than ever...

"You are very sweet, that is so nice of you, I'm glad you were ok with me...."

I know it was not even a "first date" exactly, and I know what you said about  kissing, but, well, to be totally honest, the thought definitely crossed my mind...and I came very, very close to trying it....I think there was certainly some electricity there...or was it just me...

" There was some, yes, but I am wary of doing things too quickly....plus, as I said, I am dying to "make you over"....How do you feel about that? I think you are handsome, but could use some updating....You will probably want to end your current relationship before you let me do that tho, since it is usually a clear indication that you have someone new in your life...."